From the start of it all.

I want you to know:

There was a time, 

A time when when words I wrote,

made up for feelings I lacked.

There was a time when,

convenience was the answer,

the easy answer.

I followed the easier road,

because that honestly was the road 

I thought I had to choose.

There was a time when,

I was stuck. 

Stuck in the mundane practices I had thought my world to be.

I hadn’t a clue…

Until I met you. 

Honey,

I’ve never stopped writing.

With you I’ve done something I’ve never done before..

5/4 

I am blessed. You are my Prince without a doubt. You are my rock. 😊 You are my constant that I love. You truly are my everything I have been looking for. You are my man. You are my handsome man. 😉 You are the best thing I could have ever asked for. I truly thank the Lord everyday for sending you to me. You will make me want to always better myself. I will do anything to always support you and to make you happy. I love you so much Shaun Michael Arenas. And in 4 months time, we are going to start our wonderful journey with each other. I cannot wait!!! 

5/9 Ha I would rather Harry Potter rather than Rob to be honest. 😊 Ha Sorry....I will try not to distract you. 😕 I know you are busy. I definitely see you for you. I love how you are so caring, kind, selfless, always trying to be a better person. I know that you are loving to those around you and that people care for you and know that you are loyal. I am so glad I know you and your heart. 

I know I won’t be quitting. You’re too good of a man.

3.31

I can’t wait until we are married, and I can see you daily morning and night. You are the best decision of my life. You truly are the most incredible man I’ve ever met. You make me feel so wonderful. You make me laugh and smile. I love you !

Honey,

I’ve never stopped writing.

I’ve kept messages from our past.

To keep a part of our past,

with me at all times.

I need you to know,

That I don't have to make up any sort of feelings with you.

I’ve never felt like this before. 

Never had something so real. 

Never been in love, the way I’ve loved you.

This job takes it out of me..

I should be more proactive about recording,

what I’ve written. 

Honey, I need you to know:

That loving you is easy,

But’s it’s also the hardest thing I’ve ever done. 

I’m here in NC because I don’t feel good enough for you. 

Outside of just wanting a better life for us,

I need to prove to you that I will do all in power to make this succeed.

I need you to know,

My love,

I need you, like the air I breath.

I’ve never been with someone that has made me want to soar,

the way I want to when I’m with you.

Honey,

I’ve never needed to prove anything to anyone. 

Not the way I need to, to you. 

I have to show you, 

that I’m worth it. 

That I am willing to do anything, 

so that our life together will start off on the right foot. 

Honey,

I want you to know..

You complete me.

Honey.

With me, if you didn’t feel the way you do, 

and have the emotions that you have,

this couldn’t be real. 

But this is real, 

And we have it. 

I need you to know,

That I will never feel good enough,

for how you make me feel. sweetheart,

I will spend the rest of our lives together,

trying to make up to you,

for saying: 

“We can do this, If you’ll still have me.”

We will do many wonderful things together Alisha. 

We both have the same complex about one another. 

Though we may both never truly understand why we’re together. 

But thank God we are. 

To him I will forever be grateful.

For putting you in my life.

I don’t feel worthy enough for you.

But I will fight everyday for you, 

for us.